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Caption Contest: The Hotshot (The Seven Types of Software Engineers)

by The Cranky Product Manager on October 29, 2008

in The 7 Types of Engineers

Submit captions for this cartoon of “The Hotshot” in this post’s comments. And don’t forget to submit captions for the other Software Engineer Types as well…

hotshot1-293x300 Caption Contest: The Hotshot (The Seven Types of Software Engineers)The Hotshot

Smart and knows it, often quite young. Has great ideas and hacks crap together at midnight, then… is done.

Distinguishing Characteristics:

  • Unfortunately has little appreciation for what it takes to actually ship software and thus never really finishes his features and his stuff is often fragile or just broken.
  • Can’t be bothered with making sure his stuff is internationalized, thread-safe or designed to scale.
  • Can’t be troubled to fix what he built because he’s on to the next thing.
  • Detests “process” and all the process hangers-ons like QA, PM, Training, and Project/Program Managers.
  • Doesn’t read the documentation OR reads the documentation and codes something “better.”
  • Says things that annoy his fellow engineers and managers like, “If it takes Ed more than 2 days to do this feature, then he is seriously stupid.” But of course, Young Hot Shot never actually finished a real feature in just 2 days either. That is, if “finished” means working in more than just an obscure corner case scenario.
  • Rarely seen without headphones or earbuds. Plays World of Warcraft and Halo.
  • Drinks Red Bull and stacks empty cans up in his cube as some sort of offering to the God of Unmaintainable Software.
  • All shirts purchased from threadless.com. Appears to either skate or snowboard. Green IM status 24/7.
  • Natural habitat is start up environments.

Do you need this engineer?
Depends on whether you’re building something that a person will eventually need to use.

Project Pitfalls:
None, really, because you are not even on his radar.

Achilles Heel:
Cannot build evolvable, sustainable software.

Best Bet:
Convince him he’s a genius who really belongs in your company’s “Innovation” or R&D group.


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Caption Contest Winners: 7 Types of Software Engineers | The Cranky Product Manager
12.24.08 at 3:16 pm

{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }

1 The Cranky Product Manager 10.29.08 at 3:56 pm

To get things rolling:

“Dude, can’t hear you. Just IM me.”

“He told you TWO WEEKS?!? Dude, I could build that thing in 2 freakin’ HOURS.”

2 Scott Sehlhorst 10.30.08 at 5:46 am

Comments? The code is the comments - just hire someone smart enough to read it.

3 V Breakey 10.30.08 at 6:38 am

Yeah project is gonna be late, Gaslight Anthem is playing a club show and I’m so gonna be there dude.

4 Greg 10.30.08 at 9:41 am

Dude, I finished that code last night. I’m sure it works! Now ’scuse me while I go grab a Red Bull…

5 roadmapwarrior 10.30.08 at 10:52 am

It works as designed.

6 Dave 10.30.08 at 10:41 pm

I told you - all they need is the latest version of the SDK.

7 The Other Eric 11.02.08 at 11:17 am

“If YOUR users don’t understand it, then YOUR users are stupid and they don’t deserve ME.”

8 Stewart Rogers 11.04.08 at 8:03 am

Tests? QA write tests.

9 Eric 11.06.08 at 6:15 pm

C# is so old school

or

A level 5 Night Elf noob wouldn’t even use Visual Studio

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