The Cranky Product Manager has gone all new-agey — doing yoga and eating organic food and crap like that…rethinking life, trying to think positive (“I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and doggone it, people like me”) and all. (What’s next? Macrame?)
Anyway, perhaps as a result, the Cranky Product Manager’s body has become less poluted and her psyche a bit more courageous. More intrepid. Less of a chicken-shit. And as such, the CPM has actually started SPEAKING… out LOUD! And you, gentle readers, can even listen in.
First, there was a podcast with the illustrious ho-bag Forrester analyst Tom Grant, back in June.
And then, there was the recent podcast with the celebrated Michael Ray Hopkin, proprietor of the glorious Lead on Purpose Blog and The Product Management Pulse.
Check em’ out. We discuss all kinda fun stuff, like, is product management the best job or the most wretched? Where should PM report in the organization (don’t PMs just LOVE to debate that one)? How do you handle those pesky Sales Droids? Why do you sometime have to shoot your product in the head?
Note that in both podcasts, the Cranky Product Manager’s “real voice” has been distorted mightily, and that her hideous cackle-laugh has been replaced with an equally horrendous, yet different, cackle-laugh. The Cranky PM is not that courageous yet, folks. (You will, however, determine that that Cranky Product Manager has a quintessential middle-America accent. Go do some detective work with that.)
Next up? The Cranky Product Manager is going to speak IN THE FLESH at The Business of Software 2009 Conference (a Joel of Software Conference) in San Francisco, November 9-11. It should be a WICKED AWESOME conference. The possibility of meeting the adorably brilliant Joel Spolsky and her hero Geoffrey Moore (not to mention the wicked awesomeness of Kathy Sierra, Heidi Roizen, Don Norman and Paul Graham) is why the Cranky Product Manager decided to take on this risky adventure.
Needless to say, the Cranky PM is scared s#!#less. She’s not yet sure how she’ll handle the anonymity issue — should she “come out”? Wear a wig and sunglasses? Hire a devastatingly attractive model to go in her place? Take lessons from that douche David Blaine on how to enter and escape from a conference room without witnesses? Or what…?
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ASIDE:
Maybe it’s time to just come out and get it over with. A wise reader recently forwarded the Cranky Product Manager this advice from famous blogger Penelope Trunk – she says to blog under your real name, as someone whose anonymous blog went so awry that she ended up chaning her REAL NAME to her pen name. And while the Cranky Product Manager is DEFINITELY not EVER going to change her real name to “Cranky PM”, it did give her food for thought….
{ 19 comments… read them below or add one }
I still enjoy your being in the closet. It’s some of the
charmfun of your writing.Were you using a tin can filled with dirty gym socks to disguise your voice? If so, how MacGyver of you!
I enjoy the Cranky PM for what it is. But the ongoing saga of the Cranky PM feels like it’s starting to overshadow the satire/advice being offered. Coming out is a personal decision–and a life-changing one–because, unless you’re Peter Parker in One More Day, once you unveil yourself you can’t put that genie back into the bottle. One way, to have it both ways, would be to phase out the Cranky PM while starting up a new blog under your real identity. All depends on what you thought/goals/feelings are.
You’d have to ask Mr. Hopkin and Mr. Grant how they distorted the Cranky PM’s voice. She has no idea.
Alas, on re-reading this post, I realize it again sounds like whining about being anonymous. This happens when you are an egomaniac like the CPM, because gosh darnit it is all about ME and shouldn’t you all care about that all the time.
Anyhoo, truly, my intent was to get you to listen to the podcasts, which are about PRODUCT MANAGEMENT, not about the Cranky Product Manager. Listen to them. We discuss if PM is the crappiest job in the company or the most awesome, where PM should report, how to get along with Sales Droids, etc.
Hmmmm…now I’m going to be keeping reeeeeeeal close tabs on my best friend. If she heads out to CA in November, my suspicions will be confirmed.
NEUMANN? IS THAT YOU?!?! FESS UP, CHICKIE! ;-) ;-)
Cranky, (I feel like we’re on a first-name basis now) thanks for doing the interview on the PM Pulse. To me it shows your real side and shows the value you bring to the product management world. I don’t envy the work it must take to keep the Cranky PM going. FWIW, I say keep it going as long as you can.
-Michael
Cranky, honey. Here’s the thing. You go girl. Anonymous isn’t necessary. I promise. I have realized that I am done with software and product management and user experience – unless someone calls me and forces me to engage for huge sums of money. But you need to take this step. If not now when. I am telling you from 20 years down the road. Take the chance.
New Cranky Blog Post! “The Cranky Product Manager Speaks” – http://bit.ly/37n2re
The Cranky Product Manager Speaks http://bit.ly/U8xmp
RT @crankypm: New Cranky Blog Post "The CPM Speaks"-http://bit.ly/37n2re [JD} #prodmgmt, if she "comes out" will it affect your view of CPM?
Rt @crankypm “The Cranky Product Manager Speaks” – http://bit.ly/37n2re
The CPM thinks she sounds like a dude in these podcasts… http://bit.ly/37n2re
Fake Steve Jobs. ‘Nuff said.
My advice – do it if you can get paid.
The only reason I would come out if I were you would be for the fame and glory (and by that I mean money). It’s easier to squeeze value out of your super-star blogger status if people can actually hire you for stuff like speaking engagements, and consulting on “social media strategy” and all that other stuff that famous bloggers do and appear to be getting paid good coin to do it.
Treat it like a product launch. Set some goals (and by that I mean money – see the theme here?) build the plan and then do it.
And for pete’s sake, make someone pay you for your first “public” appearance! You’ve made a big investment in this thing – time to take a withdrawal.
April
@April: great advice!
Cranky, you have my vote to remain anonymous – even at your upcoming speaking gig. You can add to the mystique with a limo waiting to whisk you away for a quick costume change.
@April: +1 on getting paid
The Cranky Product Manager Speaks http://bit.ly/1P4zjE #postrank #prod_mgmt
I vote that CRM hire a leggy blonde actress to memorize deliver the talk. Where are those 28 yo washed up ex-models when you need them?
Actually, what I would do is re-read every single post and write down what would most bother you about what you have said. You might find that what you have said is satirical, humorous, and anchored in some ugly but realistic truths. Then decide if any perceived consequences are worth the potential fame and glory. If, perchance, you started CPM out of a secret desire to have an alternative to actually being a CPM, then that is one thing. Make your subconscious ‘fess up. Otherwise, sell frame adverts and continue as anonymous. Will you be comfortable being your snarky self when you know your co-workers will read the blog?
Only you can answer these questions. Once the cat is out of the bag, it’s out.
(Heck, anonymous could be a marketing boon in itself. How much press would you get out of that? Make it fun, wear a burka.)