Quantum Whisper was kind enough to supply the Cranky PM with expensive lattes this month.  They are a wicked awesome company that links customer feedback to your backlog.  Crank-tastic!

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At LONG LAST, the World's Most Generic Product Management Interview wraps up.

The Cranky Product Manager will just say that creating these videos is a lot more tedious than you might expect. Especially since she is a lousy speller and the xtranormal thing lacks spell check. She is really sick of those monotone voices! So this will be the VERY LAST CARTOON for a while.

(And if you received this post via email or your RSS reader and cannot see the embedded video/cartoon, view it here.)
 

Check it, Part 6, THE FINAL CHAPTER!

And if you haven't seen the previous videos, find them here.

PARTS 1 &  2 - The interview dress code.  The first slew of generic questions.

PART 3 - Even more generic questions.  Round manholes, anyone?

PART 4 - Questions that require you be a much better PM than the hiring manager.

PART 5 - Do you have any questions for me?

PART 6 - The Final Chapter - What are the next steps?

( And don't forget to buy your colleagues holiday gifts.  How 'bout some Cranky PM mugs? )

This hideously cranky post is sponsored by Quantum Whisper, a wicked awesome company that links customer feedback to your backlog.  Can you say OMFG!

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Ack, almost done.  At long last, our glum product management applicant gets to ask a question of his cranky interviewer.

(And if you received this post via email or your RSS reader and cannot see the embedded video/cartoon, view it here.)
 

Check it, Part 5:

And if you haven't seen the previous videos, find them here.

PARTS 1 &  2 - The interview dress code.  The first slew of generic questions.

PART 3 - Even more generic questions.  Round manholes, anyone?

PART 4 - Questions that require you be a much better PM than the hiring manager.

( And don't forget to buy your colleagues holiday gifts.  How 'bout some Cranky PM mugs? )

This crankylicious post is sponsored by Quantum Whisper, a wicked awesome company that supports agile product management. Check'em out!

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Oy, the Cranky Product Manager is out of steam on this video thing.   Just a few more parts of The World's Most Generic Product Management Interview video.  Here you go.  (And if you received this post via email or your RSS reader and cannot see the embedded video/cartoon, click HERE

Part 4:

Parts 5 & 6 are almost done and will be posted shortly, before Christmas. Promise.

And if you haven' t already seen parts one through three, here you go...

PARTS 1 &  2

PART 3

( And don't forget to buy your colleagues some Cranky Product Manager Christmas mugs! www.cafepress.com/crankypm )

 NOW.... the LONG awaited Part 3 of the World's Most Generic Product Management Interview.  In Video!  In Cartoons!  With monotone voices!

WITNESS as the Cranky VP of Product Management asks Clueless PM Job Candidate some lazy-ass interview questions.  Questions she read on some boring product management blog (maybe this one) two minutes before the interview started.

If you haven't seen parts 1 & 2, please view them first.  Go HERE.

(And if you are receiving this post via email, you will need to visit the actual blog to see the video - the video links are not making it into the emails for some reason.  Go here.)

(Thanks to Esteemed Member of the Crankerati Scott Sehlhorst, for the  "out-of-the-box thinking" bit.)

Watch (and groan at) the world's most generic product management interview. 

Observe as the Cranky VP of Product Management interviews an exceedingly typical product manager for a thoroughly generic product management position.

Today, you get parts 1 & 2.  The Cranky Product Manager expects that there will be six parts by the time she finishes, so stay tuned for future posts.

The World's Most Generic Product Management Interview

PART 1: Interview Dress Code

PART 2: The Questioning Begins

The Cranky Product Manager was just thinking back -- oh so nostalgically -- on her MBA years.

Ah yes, what a joy it was to devote herself full-time to the study of BUSINESS.... so different than her undergrad years as an Engineering major at a random institute of technology.

No more studying seven days and nights a week and working endless hours in the lab, all to get a lousy "B" or "C".Nope.

Business School couldn't be more different than Engineering School.  Ah yes, the easy A's.  The off-da-charts drunken parties, multiple times a week. The hot men who worked out, showered, AND shaved EVERY single day! The random hook-ups with the aforementioned hot men.  The four black tie events per year. The exotic vacations "study trips," funded by federally guaranteed student loans, to international locations with hot locals and lots of alcohol in need of the MONSTEROUS brains and awesome business expertise possessed by a gaggle of privileged 28-year-old MBA students.

What a time it was!  Those were the days!

The Cranky Product Manager took classes on marketing, finance, accounting, organizational behavior, strategy, operations, statistics, etc.  All that standard MBA stuff.  Especially the marketing and the strategy.  She ate that stuff up.

But in all her time as a drunken and downright slutty full-time MBA student, the Cranky PM never took a SINGLE class on developing products and services.   She doesn't even recall such a class being offered. (see footnote) 

...which is ODD, when you think about it.  After all, EVERY SINGLE BUSINESS IN EXISTENCE sells either a PRODUCT or a SERVICE. 

Why would a Top-10 MBA program essentially ignore the CORE of all business? 

Perhaps it is because MBA types, including the professors, think of product and service development as being the realm of engineers?  Did they think the engineering curriculum was covering it?

Maybe.  But if so, what a horrible misjudgement.  The Cranky Product Manager's computer engineering education consisted of a lot recursive loops, mathematical proofs, Turing Machines, oscilloscopes, FPGAs, and exhaustingly insane late nights (once stayed up 54 hours straight), trying to get some effing wire properly situated on a breadboard, or debugging a mind-bending multiple inheritance issue in some code written in an arcane/academic language.

The end result was that the Then-Engineer-Future-CrankyPM could probably build a product if someone told her EXACTLY what to build.  She learned NOTHING about how you decide WHAT to build, how you determine if it should even be built in the first place, or how you get ideas. And that's probably pretty typical of most Engineering educations.

Aren't these questions absolutely fundamental to any business: how you decide WHAT to build, how you determine if it should even be built in the first place, and how you get ideas???

Footnote: Sure, the Intro to Marketing class touched on the "product", but as only one of The Four P's: product, price, promotion, placement. The Marketing Research class talked a bit about products too, but it wasn't truly central to the class.
 

Ah, Prague.  How fondly the Cranky Product Manager remembers you.  Such a beautiful city. Such wonderful espresso. Such fantastic Czech beer. Plus amazing architecture. *sigh*

And even better, Prague is where the Cranky Product Manager first learned the wicked awesome English word defenestration, as in "the defenestration of hotshot engineers is tempting for most product managers, but ultimately not advised."

Anyway, because Prague is so freakin' cool, the Cranky Product Manager is going to do something she's never done before: a job posting. 

Don MacLennan, esteemed member of the Crankerati and frequent cranky commenter, happens to be the Sr. VP of Product Management at AVG.  AVG is a purveyor of antivirus and security software with an interesting freemium business model.

Dan is hiring for two roles IN PRAGUE (or maybe Brno, CZ) that would report to him: a Director of Product Management and a Product Strategy Analyst.

You don't have to speak Czech, but you must be fluent in English, written and verbal. There are no citizenship requirements, as relocation and visa sponsorship are available.

The Cranky Product Manager emailed Don several tough questions about the nature of the Director position, as she believes that many companies don't fundamentally understand what product management is.  Either that, or they set product management up for failure.

Well, she liked Don's answers -- he "gets" product management and his answers did not raise any red flags.  She can't promise these positions will be All That And More, but at least it's a good start.

So, if you're a go-getter and a rock-star level product management pro, and you want to join a growing and thriving company IN PRAGUE, check it out.  The Cranky Product Manager would apply herself if family circumstances allowed. Did she mention the positions were in PRAGUE and you don't have to be an EU citizen?

And for the record, the Cranky Product Manager does not know Don personally and she has no relationship whatsoever with AVG.  She's received no compensation or benefits of any kind for making this post. These just sounded like a really cool jobs and she wanted to let you know about them. And it seems that Dan could be a cool (although potentially cranky-in-a-good-way) boss -- after all, he is a frequent reader of this blog.

Readers, do you DETEST or LOVE the CPM using this blog to profile cool-sounding PM jobs? Big mistake? Should she ever do it again?  Please answer in the comments? Thanks!

Next post will be "No Excuses Product Management #3 - Do Your Freakin' Product Strategy Already!" Promise.

Just wanted to clarify the Cranky Product Manager's previous post on training.

The Cranky Product Manager is NOT against training for product managers.  Not at all.

In fact, she HEARTS training, and any effort product professionals make to improve their skills and knowledge.  There are some really great classes out there! (see note 1)

It's the PASSIVE nature of the 'sit-back-and-train-me' attitude that drives the Cranky Product Manager bonkers.  Especially when used as an excuse for not getting the job done.  

The Cranky Product Manager says this as someone who has supervised a fair number of product managers: if you want to use 'lack of training' as an excuse, your performance review had better NOT be the first time your boss hears about your training needs.  

Instead, you should have been making the business case for training as soon as you concluded your skill gaps were getting in the way.

Now, here's the Cranky Product Manager's recipe for "Convincing your boss to give you training."  It works.  Really.  Well a lot of the time (probably not in early-stage startups).

1. Make a 30 minute appointment with your boss.  

2. Go into this 30 minute appointment with a half-page, bulleted printed handout that he/she can review.  This handout should make the case for getting you trained and give your boss several options to consider.

3. If you're stuck, structure your doc according to a classic "Situation, Complication, Recommendation" outline.

Situation:

• The specific skills you already have
• Where you would like to be, and why your boss should agree that this is a good goal for you. (maybe refer to a previous performance review)

Complication:

• The gap between your current skills and where you want to be
• If you were to remedy this gap, how would the company benefit? What's in it for your boss?  In which release would your boss's life improve, due to your improved skills?  

Recommendations:

• List a few different options for closing the skill gap (bosses love to pick from different options).  For each, list the pros/cons, the cost, and the time frame. 
• The Cranky PM recommends that you suggest at least one option that involves no budget but instead involves time.
  • For example, your boss could tutor you in this specific skill and meet with you once or twice a week.  In proposing this option, you should be very specific about how often you'd want to meet and what you would need from the boss (without seeming too needy).  Example: (provide face-to-face feedback on the latest version of my product strategy document once a week, help me brainstorm how to segment the market, give me a lollipop and a "you're a SUPERSTAR" sticker at the end, etc).
  • Note that the bigger the time commitment needed for your "free" option, the more likely your boss is to pick another option.  
• Make sure you highlight which option YOU recommend and why. 
• Acknowledge that there are several constraints at play: budget, release schedules, who will pick up the slack while you sit in training, etc. Explain how you will minimize these impacts.

4. Go over the handout in the meeting.  Get your boss nodding "yes" as you mention each point.  Hopefully that yes-nodding will get her/his neck limbered up, and s/he will also agree to one of your training options.

5. If your boss immediately picks an option, great. Go back to your desk, write an email to the boss saying something "Thanks for meeting with me today. We agreed that I should sign up for training class X."  Then go sign up. Hurry. (But pray there is a decent cancellation policy if your boss is one of those people who changes his/her mind every 3 minutes).

If your boss wants more time to think about it, do NOT leave the meeting without nailing down a time frame for a decision.  Immediately set a meeting for follow-up.

6. Remember, NO WHINING!  No "you owe me." Keep focused on the benefits of your training to YOUR BOSS and the company.  

7. If the boss says "no," be mature about it. Try to understand why. Then go educate yourself as directed in the previous post, using all the resources of the online PM community.  And then, in a few months, try again.

Now, you might worry that all this would be pestering and annoying to your boss. That's a valid worry.  But more likely is that your boss would be 20% annoyed (because now s/he has to make a decision and maybe spend some money) and 80% patting him/herself on the back for hiring such a high-potential, results-focused product manager. Because the way you approach the training issue shows how you would also approach the rest of your job.

Note 1: The Cranky Product has partaken of many training opportunities (a self-funded MBA, Product Camps, UC Extension, Pragmatic Marketing), but her employers never paid. Apparently, she did not master the above-described technique until too late in her career, when she became the boss and found herself on the receiving end.

In this post, The Cranky Product Manager continues her vendetta against all those sniveling product managers who trot out pathetic excuses for NOT DOING THEIR FREAKIN’ JOBS.

This is Part 2 of here NO EXCUSES PRODUCT MANAGEMENT series.  Enjoy Part 1 here.  There will be at least parts 3 and 4 (and who knows, maybe there will be more).

LAME-ASS PRODUCT MANAGEMENT EXCUSE #2: "I never received training on how to do that."

Ah, young product manager, do you think you are in Sales or Customer Support or something? Training? For Product Managers? Surely, you must be drunk. Part of your job is to CREATE and GIVE training to everyone else at the company, and yet you somehow have the temerity to expect to get some for yourself?

OK, seriously. The Cranky Product Manager sympathizes, but just a little.  After all, she never had an ounce of employer-sponsored PM training bestowed upon her until, well, never. (On second thought, the Cranky Product Manager has absolutely no sympathy for you at all.)

Your passive "sit-back-and-train-me" attitude, especially when used as a responsibility dodge, makes the Cranky Product Manager want to slap you fire you.  WTF?!? You’re a product manager for Dog’s sake!  Your CORE INSTINCT is supposed to be identifying what’s needed and where the gaps are, and then figuring out a way — if necessary, a CREATIVE way — to eliminate the gaps.

So if your PM skills are lacking, then figure out WHAT training you need and WHY (see Note 1). Then make the business case to your boss – just as you would for building a new product or a new feature!

And if your boss says "no budget", well, show some initiative and EDUCATE YOURSELF. Go to Product Camps. Read blogs and articles. Ask questions of people and LinkedIn. Watch online webinars or some of the free online courses. Join a local product management association that hosts monthly speakers. Read some books. NO EXCUSES! All this stuff is FREE or a complete bargain.

(Yes, the Cranky Product Manager realizes that she should not be yelling at you, an Esteemed Member of the Crankerati.  The fact that you are even reading this post means that you probably read other more educational PM blogs and have taken charge of your own professional development.  Please forgive the Cranky PM for lashing out.)

To wrap up, let’s address a potential hole in the Cranky Product Manager’s logic that you may have spotted: namely, her argument that if you lack Product Management skills, well you should use your Product Management skills to get some training or  train yourself.  Seems a bit circular, but only if you believe that determination, taking initiative, and resourcefulness are "skills" that can be taught in a training class. Au contraire, the Cranky Product Manager believes these are personality traits that can’t be taught to a fully formed adult without psychotherapy or a religious experience.

Now, repeat after me:  NO EXCUSES!

NOTE 1:  If you don’t know where to get training, check the comments on this post.  The Cranky Product Manager expects that many of the product management training vendors will post something.  

But vendors, listen up!  Don’t abuse the Cranky Product Manager’s comment section, or she’ll delete your ass.  

First, your training company may post exactly ONE "pitch" comment, with exactly ONE link.  

Second, if the comments section (or the Cranky PM’s email/Twitter accounts) turns into a bad-mouthing or whining fest, akin to the local junior high school scene, the Cranky Product Manager will shut the whole thing down. Promise.

These days, lots of people arrive here with Google searches like “how to find a new product management position.”

Not surprising.  So many of us have gotten the axe recently.

SO, darling and esteemed Crankerati, the Cranky Product Manager asks you to help:

What/who are the best resources for people looking for PM jobs? – Please leave your “Most Helpful Job Search Resources for PMs/PMMs” in the comments.

Please share your favorite resources.  Especially if you are a hiring manager – where do you look for candidates?

Below are a few resources that come to mind – services and recruiters that the Cranky Product Manager has encountered or used (as a satisfied user and nothing more – no kickbacks or $$ or anything involved)

Online Job Search Resources

• LinkedIn
• The pm_jobs email list on Yahoo! groups
• Ventureloop.com – directory of jobs with venture-funded companies
• Dice
• Indeed.com
• SimplyHired
• CareerBuilder
• http://productmanager.com/
• http://pmconsortium.ning.com – Seattle area jobs
• Craigslist/

Recruiters / Headhunters that focus on product management and product marketing jobs

• Gravity People
• Jivaro
• Levinger Lewis

PM Training on the cheap ( as in FREE)

• Archived webinars on the Product Management View website (Feature Plan‘s site)

Related Posts:

• Seeking Gems in a Sea of Manure
• How to Get Hired By The Cranky Product Manager
• A Short Guide to Being an Unemployed Product Manager – Part 1, 2, 3 & 4