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marketing

The Enlightened Stupid Marketer (a marvelous video)

by The Cranky Product Manager on June 3, 2009

in Marketing

Thanks to Midlakewinter for the link to this very-funny-but-in-an-uncomfortable-kind-of-way video, entitled the Enlightened Stupid Marketer.

It’s especially uncomfortable if you play it for your marketing weenie husband… in response to his declaring that product functionality is irrelevant to product success.  And as a crabby-ass beeyotch and an extremely insecure individual, the Cranky Product Manager took this wrong-headed statement as a personal attack on her career choice.  So, she decided to poke him where it hurts, the extremely mature individual that she is.

WATCH THAT VIDEO, MARKETING WEENIE HUSBAND.  WATCH!

Enjoy!

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If a PR / Marcom Weenie Wrote This Blog

by The Cranky Product Manager on June 2, 2009

in Marketing

If a PR / Marcom Weenie Wrote This Blog, here’s what the About page would look like:

About The Cranky Product Manager

Founded in 2006, The Cranky Product Manager (aka CPM) is a leading provider of world-class, robust, scalable, and market leading content platform that helps product professionals unlock value and position themselves for success in the marketplace, while realizing a high return on investment. Built on a next-generation, Web 2.0-based and AJAX-enabled platform, the Cranky Product Manager takes a three-pronged approach to content delivery utilizing social media and has thousands of users at leading Fortune 500 companies, including Microsoft, Apple, Oracle, SAP, Google, Yahoo, and the US Government.

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The Cranky Product Manager bitchslaps the Cranky Marketer

April 15, 2009

OK, so the Cranky Product Manager has been a big lazy pants lately.  No posts for over 10 days and then relying on guest posts for the past few weeks.  What can she say?  She’s drowning under a pile of work, dealing with her frakin’ taxes (which were WICKED complicated this year), and adjusting to [...]

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Guest Post: The Cranky Marketer Goes Off – Part Deux

March 26, 2009

The Cranky Product Manager is SUPER LAZY these days. Once again, she’s letting someone else do the work – the Cranky Marketer – the dude/dudette in charge of Marketing at a B2B tech company. This is part TWO of three (see part one here).
This post is a  longie but a goodie, so check [...]

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Why it doesn’t matter where Product Management lives in the organization

December 2, 2008

The Cranky Product Manager has read, and listened, and pondered, and debated, and bit her tongue over the years, as others have debated the proper place in the organization for the Product Management function.  Should it be in Engineering? Or in Marketing? Or in its own Products organization that reports directly to the CEO?
Not surprisingly, [...]

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Why it doesn't matter where Product Management lives in the organization

December 2, 2008

The Cranky Product Manager has read, and listened, and pondered, and debated, and bit her tongue over the years, as others have debated the proper place in the organization for the Product Management function.  Should it be in Engineering? Or in Marketing? Or in its own Products organization that reports directly to the CEO?
Not surprisingly, [...]

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The Engineering VP Who Couldn’t “Get” Product Positioning

October 6, 2008

The Cranky Product Manager has taken up grinding her teeth once again.  It’s the frustration. From dealing with Development.  What is it this time?  Well, let the CPM explain.
The Cranky PM is sure that most of her product management brethren are familiar with that oft-cited formula for a product positioning statement:
For [target customer], who wants/needs [...]

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The Engineering VP Who Couldn't "Get" Product Positioning

October 6, 2008

The Cranky Product Manager has taken up grinding her teeth once again.  It’s the frustration. From dealing with Development.  What is it this time?  Well, let the CPM explain.
The Cranky PM is sure that most of her product management brethren are familiar with that oft-cited formula for a product positioning statement:
For [target customer], who wants/needs [...]

Read the full article →