the great one

Submit captions for this cartoon of “The Great One” in this post’s comments. And don’t forget to submit captions for the other Software Engineer Types as well…

The Great One

Where did this engineer come from, and can you have five more of him?

Distinguishing Characteristics:

• Always delivers on schedule, even when unforeseen code bottlenecks require more time that initially estimated.
• If unforeseen bottlenecks arise, you don’t hear about it from this engineer. Instead, you hear about how this engineer worked all weekend from one of his peers.
• Respected by engineering peers. Professional in meetings.
• Honest with estimates.
• May have a Star Trek accent or a superhero fetish. Loves watching “How It’s Made”.
• Solid code, sometimes delivers more than what was requested.
• After the feature is launched, asks whether it met the users’ needs.
• Keeps up with his bug queue.

Do you need this engineer?
Um, duh.

Project Pitfalls:
Try not to hug this engineer in public. He gets embarrassed and human contact is sometimes confusing.

Achilles Heel:
This engineer is so dependable that his manager tends to put him on every project. He sometimes has trouble saying “no”, so can become overstretched. Also he tends to be optimistic in his estimates.

Best Bet:

• Give lots of public credit to this engineer, even if he doesn’t care about that — because his peers might.
• Send nice notes to his management.
• Don’t ask him to attend time-waster meetings, but if he must, publicly change the agenda to accommodate his part first so he can leave quickly.
• Add time to his initial estimates to buy him some wiggle room.
• Play Halo with him
• Bring him food.
• Ask how you can help him, and ask often.
• Encourage this engineer to breed.

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